Jim once worked with a defiant boy, Kevin, who was forever getting in trouble at home and school. His mother expressed frustration at not being able to get through to her son: ‘He’s a bright boy but he never seems to learn – he keeps making the same mistakes over and over again.’
The wonderful thing about Jim was that he always accepted you for who you were. He never used a judgmental tone; he believed in the goodness of children and was always prepared to hear their side.
Over the 5-day program, Jim earned Kevin’s trust by simply being himself: gentle but firm when required, honest, quick to explain anything and quick to laugh. He marvelled in everything that Kevin achieved, big and small. Towards the end of the program, Jim asked Kevin if he knew the meaning of ‘consequence.’
‘Oh yeah,’ Kevin replied, ‘that’s what Mum and Dad say when I’ve been naughty.’ He did not really have an understanding of the concept of consequence, or realise that it did not necessarily mean something negative.
To help Kevin understand, Jim taught him to create clay models to symbolise the words he did not understand. He began with the word ‘change,’ before moving on to ‘co-operation,’ ‘compromise’ and ‘consequence.’
The other Learning Co-ordinators and I went on to use this clay exercise in programs when necessary. The aim of the exercise is to give people a clear comprehension of significant sequencing words. If they can create and describe a word themselves, they have grasped its meaning. The first model to create is change.
It is important to first discuss the word change, to gauge a person’s understanding of it. If they don’t know, don’t tell them straight away. Perhaps make your own clay model as an example. Teenagers and adults can look up the definition in a dictionary. Play acting and creating social stories are also fun options. Examples of change could be: planting a seed, getting a haircut, an egg hatching, an ice block melting to a puddle, growing taller.
Following change, models can be created to symbolise cooperation, compromise and consequence. Two clay models are usually used to capture the meaning of the word clearly. For example: the first model for cooperation might show two people not cooperating, with a second model showing the pair building together or pulling a rope tow. Compromise could be represented by a model of 2 people living on opposite sides of the world, with the second model capturing them meeting in the middle (or 2 separate pizzas, with a second model showing one pizza with 2 different toppings!). Creating consequence is usually the most fun. One very artistic child modelled an elaborate stove and pot, with a second model of a cake (if the ingredients are baked, they will become a cake). An animal lover created a stick figure with a bowl of food, then a fat cat with a very contented smile on its face (if you feed your cat, then your cat will be happy and healthy). One child modelled a boy eating vegetables, and in a second model showed the same boy eating a giant ice-cream (if you eat your vegetables you will get dessert)!
When making these words with children, I’ve found that it’s important to always make their meaning neutral at first – not about them or you. The, later, apply them to their life: ‘Where do you think that cooperation would help you or your family?’
You can really make any word – forgiveness, resentment, trust. It needs to be a concept that the child can generalise, and they need to be able to show the meaning in different forms in order to really comprehend it.
